In any relationship, there are obstacles that are difficult to overcome. Couples suffer through communication barriers, pent-up feelings that are left unaddressed, and general feelings of neglect and misuse, often leaving both partners in a relationship wondering, “Is it worth it?” The answer, if you’re seeking counseling help, is probably, yes; it is worth it. When you’ve come to the conclusion together that you need to see a couples therapist, and you’ve made the decision to actually find a reputable couples counselor, you’re already on your way to repairing or improving your relationship.
Although there are relationship problems that are more common, there’s no guidebook you can read to tell you which problems you and your partner are having, where those problems stem from, and how to work through those problems. Often times, the wonderful thing about couples therapy is the presence of a neutral third party to listen and communicate impartially – something many couples don’t do in their own relationships. If you’re in need of someone to listen, observe, and help you ask and answer tough questions, then couples counseling is exactly what you need. You’ll gain insight into yourself, your partner, and your relationship, begin to understand how you can improve elements of your relationship, and gain practice correcting the mistakes you make in your relationship.
Eliminate Relationship Conflicts, Create Conversation
One of the most common issues in any relationship has to do with communication. For one reason or another, we all forget that our partners can’t read our minds – no matter how much we might want them to. Whether we’re self-conscious, we assume our partner knows what we’re thinking or want, we want our partner to “figure it out” on their own, or we’re simply unaware that we’re making communicating difficult, there’s always a solution, and it always involves both partners. It takes two to continue an argument, settle a conflict, or have an effective conversation, so both parties have to be ready to communicate at all times, no matter the mindset of the other. If you find that you and your partner have difficulty with effective and open communication, couples counseling can help you create conversation that’s free of conflict and that promotes a healthier relationship.
Steps to Rebuilding a Healthy Relationship
When you’re having difficulties in your relationship, can’t understand why things continue to go wrong, or don’t know how to resolve your issues, try out these seven steps to help you and your partner rebuild a healthier relationship that you both can appreciate.
1. Act from love, making decisions and reacting without forgetting what makes your relationship important to you.
2. Create better communication and reduce misunderstandings with “I” statements, like “I feel,” “I think,” or “I want” so that your needs and desires are clear.
3. Give your relationship the priority it needs to thrive.
4. Listen to your partner without agenda. Don’t enter a conversation hoping to “win” a fight. Being mutually engaged in a conversation empowers partners to listen for the sake of fostering understanding of one another.
5. Keep up with the things that make you happy outside of your relationship so that you have a way to relieve daily stresses. You’ll feel recharged and relaxed, helping to eliminate some tension that could be negatively affecting your relationship or communication.
6. Share a daily agenda with your partner, and stick to that agenda. If your plans change, let your partner know so that you are sharing your daily experiences and maintaining effective communication.
7. Be an empathetic partner, placing yourself in the shoes of your partner. Everyone wants to feel understood, and the more you understand about your partner, the more you can learn from them, and the more your relationship will grow.
Experienced Relationship Therapist
When searching for a couples’ therapist, it’s important to consider the type of environment you and your partner need to rebuild your relationship and foster better communication. At The International Center for the Attainment for Love and Joy, we focus on using the love you share in your relationship to build bridges, create happiness, and ensure that your relationship continues to progress in spite of and because of the obstacles you and your partner face. With 35 years of experience in couples counseling, we can help you work through the problems specific to your relationship, create solutions that you can turn to outside of counseling, and help you foster the ability to navigate your relationship with your partner to a relationship you can both find joy in.
No matter the reason for seeking couples counseling, call us today at 763-572-2326 or toll-free at 877-572-2326, or send an email to , and find out how we can help you repair, rebuild, and improve your relationship.